Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Merry Christmas from our family to yours


Due to the absolute RUSH of the holidays, I will not be posting on my regular day. But my partners in crime here at MB4 and I want to let you know that we wish you a very Merry Christmas! I hope it is the best you've ever had. If you are up for a little story, go on over to my website, and check out the Christmas story I have put up for free. Shannon and Dwayne are up to their necks in Christmas shenanigans and you don't wanna miss it!

Here is a little poem that says best what some of us are going through!
I hope this isn't you!!

Twas the Night Before Christmas in the Kitchen
author unknown

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the kitchen
I was cooking and baking and moanin' and bitchin'
I've been here for hours, I can't stop to rest.
This room's a disaster, just LOOK at this mess!

Tomorrow I've got thirty people to feed.
They expect all the trimmings. Who CARES what I need?
My feet are both blistered; I've got cramps in my legs,
And the cat's just knocked over my bowl full of eggs!

There's a knock on the door and the telephone's ringing;
frosting drips on the counter as the microwave's dinging!
Two pies in the oven, dessert's almost done
and my cookbook is soiled with butter and crumbs.

I've had all I can stand. I can't take anymore.
Then in walks my husband spilling RUM on the floor!
He weaves and he wobbles, his balance unsteady,
Then grins as he chuckles "the egg nog is ready!"

He looks all around and then says with regret
"What's taking so long...arent you through in here yet?"
AS QUICK as a flash I reach for a knife!
He loses an earlobe... I WANTED HIS LIFE!

He flees from the room in terror and pain;
"MY GOD WOMAN, YOU'RE GOING INSANE!
Now what was I doing and what is that smell?
Oh NO its the pies! They're burned all to hell!

I hate to admit when I make a mistake,
but I put them on BROIL instead of on BAKE.
What else can go wrong? Is there still more ahead?
If this is "good living," I'd rather be dead!

Lord, don't get me wrong, I love the holidays;
It just leaves me exhausted, all shaky and dazed!
But I promise you one thing, if I live 'til next year,
you won't find me pulling my hair out in here!

I'll hire a maid, a cook and a waiter;
And if THAT doesn't work...
Christmas better come LATER!


MERRY CHRISTMAS Y'ALL!!!!!!

5 comments:

Every Day Bloggers said...

Merry Christmas, Marta, Kim, SW & Aaron. May all your dreams come true.

Thanks for all the neat stuff I learned, and for the fascinating writers. Visiting your blog is always a treat.
--
joylene

Aaron Paul Lazar said...

Merry Christmas to all! May your holidays be peaceful and warm. God Bless!

Joylene Nowell Butler said...

You're an awesome poet, Kim!

Have the best ever Christmas.

Marta Stephens said...

Merry Christmas everyone! Thank you for making MURDER BY 4 great place to meet.

s.w. vaughn said...

Merry...

Yeah. Christmas. What everyone else said. :-)