A spoof, for some Thursday fun

copyright Kim Smith 2008

The batch of fantastic shorts and excerpts coming from my colleagues has inspired me to hunt up something to post. I believe like so many others that stories are deep inside of us and like a well running beneath the surface of the land, only needs someone to dig in there and pull it out.

Here is my contribution.

It is an attempt to write a news article. Of course, it is a spoof, as I write so much humor, I find it hard to do elsewise. So imagine, if you will, what would happen if the rhyme, Jack and Jill, (Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after)

were turned into a news story.
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From the AP…


Today, climbing champion Jack Stumble was found at the bottom of an embankment, the victim of an apparent murder/suicide.

His personal assistant, Jill Fine, had accompanied Stumble to the High, a popular nightspot on top of the bluffs, to meet with local wrestling celebrity, Pail O. Water. According to reports an argument broke out when Stumble tried to get Water to go somewhere with them. Water attacked Stumble causing him to fall to his death. Fine, distraught over the incident threw herself over the guard-rail after Stumble. Her body was found a few feet away.

At this time, police have Pail O. Water in custody but as of yet have not charged him.
Autopsies were called for on both Fine and Stumble.